measure your life in love

I know, I know.
How cliche can I get?
But, this title is appropriate in more ways than one:

1. Elon just finished its production of RENT. I will attempt to give you a review of the show, but I might at times be forced to simply just say "AAAAAHHHHHHHHH" because, in reality, that's what my mind was doing as I walked out of McCrary on Sunday night. I've seen the movie for years now, I know the music by heart--I've even watched the last Broadway production on DVD (thanks to my wonderful mother who bought it for me). My point is, I know the show. And I went into it knowing that I would be emotionally affected (I cry at everything, for those of you who don't know me). But there was something about seeing it acted out in front of me, about seeing and literally being overwhelmed by the emotional tension on that stage...all of that coupled with the music and the set and the phenomenal (truly truly spectacular) acting and--I was a mess. I cried, certainly, but I also found myself mentally struggling to pull myself out of being overwhelmed by the show. The odd part was, I was upset for a completely different reason than I expected. I think I've grown a lot since I was first exposed to many of the issues brought to light in the show. AIDS is no longer some fantasy disease, love is no longer something that grown-ups do, and life is now more than simply going to school and surviving. While I'm not affected by disease in the way some of the characters are, I am living with my own demons, my own struggles and issues that have the potential to bring me down...and they do some days, certainly, but I've grown to realize that it's truly about living with, not dying from, these problems. I may not live the same la vie Boheme that the characters of RENT do, but I have my own life, my own way of striving to find joy and success in the world around me, and I've got to do my best to live it.

2. (That was a really long explanation, sorry) Also, yesterday was Valentine's Day! I know that a lot of people "hate" that day because they're single and it seems like a smack in the face, a reminder that you don't have a significant other, but the rest of the world does...which is SO false. First of all, there are plenty of single people in this world, living their lives, embracing the world around them without a romantic interest to distract them from (or to necessitate) their happiness! Dependence on someone else shouldn't determine your happiness on one silly Hallmark holiday. Also, if you are single, you can make the best of Valentine's Day with your friends! Yesterday, a group of my friends on the hall all got together and went to dinner--we were each other's date for the evening, and we had the best time (although I wouldn't really know because I had to leave super early). Celebrate the love that you do have in your life!

3. I just started my job with SPARKS this week! AND, February is Love Your Body month...see, so much love! We're all about promoting healthy body image and self-confidence--we even have cute buttons that say "I <3 My Body" which are surprisingly a big hit with the students here. I can't wait to get more involved with SPARKS and to see what the future holds!

4. I'm done rambling now, I promise :)

no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should

I'm sitting in my room (which has been newly rearranged), on my futon, looking out my window. The clock is literally chiming eleven as I type this, the sun is almost at its peak, the church steeple is in full view, the wind is rustling through the trees...I'm in love with this day.

It's now February! First semester officially began yesterday--today is my second day of new classes, which I am not ashamed to say I am so excited about! Yesterday went pretty smoothly. I had one class at 10:30; it lasted until 12:10, and I had a break until 5:30! My early class was my honors seminar, Intellectual History, which I think is going to be pretty great. It's going to be tough, I can tell, but definitely worth my while. My professor had us try to envision the moment when man first developed the idea that we all have a right to make our own decisions and choose our paths in life. To think of a time when this wasn't seen as truth, and to then try and imagine what it must have felt like to realize that life could be so...different, so much more your own...it's baffling. I think I'll like this class. I had health at 5:30, which I thought was going to be boring, but my professor is great. She's funny and let us out way early, which was nice, seeing as I normally eat between the hours of 5:30 and 7:10...I was slightly concerned about my stomach (of course).

I had my first literature class this morning!! It was British Lit I, and my professor is actually my academic advisor. I haven't met her yet personally, but I think she's going to be a great professor. The class might actually be interesting compared to the Brit Lit I took in high school...anyway, I have Camerata at 12:15 and then Chorale directly after that at 1:40 (basically three hours of singing--can't wait!) and then Educational Psych later this afternoon! I'm really looking forward to that class because (I think) it will legitimately pertain to what I want to do in life, which is exciting for me.

TM starts again on Thursday! I don't even think I realize how excited I am about that...I might not until I get there, but I can't wait to see everybody and to sing with them again and to take off my shoes and....it's going to be amazing! I also start my job with SPARKS soon! Our first meeting is Monday, so I'll keep you posted about that.

Emotionally I think I'm doing pretty well, actually. Again, there are some amazing people in my life right now that I cannot be more thankful for! It was so great seeing Mom over Fake Break and catching up, especially since I won't be back until late April. I'm glad she was able to visit for the few days that she did--I hope I didn't bore her too much, as there isn't really anything to do in Elon, especially over break!

These past few weeks have been full of truly wonderful things and people--I am so blessed and cannot even begin to be thankful enough for everything. Even better--I can't wait for the future and for what's to come! If it's anything like this past month...let's just say that I'll just keep getting happier and even more disgustingly mushy in these posts.

You know you love it :)

I'm alive!

In keeping with tradition, the desire to update this blog came to me at nearly three in the morning...I'm just back from an amazing night: I went to the basketball game against Georgia Southern (we totally kicked butt) and then headed over to the TM house and had one last hurrah before Winter Term is officially over!

Let me explain Winter Term really quick: We basically have the option to take one class for three hours every day for the month of January...it's like fitting in a class in a month. There are finals and projects and everything just like normal, and we get a full four credit hours. It's just super condensed. And this normally would be a great thing, except my class is from 8:30 to 11:30 every day. Which means that, after lunch, I have an empty schedule--and I do absolutely nothing. I've been to the gym a couple of times...that was fun, I guess. I do some reading, catch up on TV shows. In all, it's extremely unproductive and I'm not quite sure I'm happy with it. But, it's almost over! And then I have fake break (a full week off between WT finals and second semester). My mom is coming, which is very exciting as I won't be home to see her until the summer! 

So, for those of you who read this and who might be even slightly curious as to what I've been up to since my last post (before Christmas, oh my gosh!), I'll give a quick recap: the new year came, I chilled at home, saw my grandparents in NC, and then hauled it back up here on the 3rd of January to get back into the swing of things! My WT class is called Animal Social Behavior in a Changing World...it's basically a lot of weird animal videos. I don't really need it for my major, but it will fulfill a much-needed science credit! TM doesn't meet during WT, so I haven't had that to fill up my time.

A lot of really amazing things have happened for me personally, though, and I'm so very thankful for that. I've gotten a lot closer to people on my hall (this is what happens when you spend hours on end with people!) and I've been able to take some time for me. I can do things that make me happy, see people that make me happy, and ultimately strive for happiness as much as possible. I was sick for one day, and then we had some snow (and a snow day!), but overall the break has been great in a personal sense. I've met some people who I predict will have a truly amazing impact on my life, and that's exhilarating to say the least! 

Musing: Parties are so much more fun when you're sober and you get to have fun with all the drunk people. It's also quite flattering to be asked, "Man, how drunk are you?" when, in reality, all that's in your cup is water.